Let me clear my throat

Think back to the days of mid-late eighties. When WWF was cool, (because you were eight). When Hulk Hogan came out of the locker room, he strutted to the tune "I am a real American". That song single handedly made me take my vitamins.

Think back to the monologue at the beginning of the movie Patton. When Patton says, "all real Americans love the sting of battle".


what's the correlation here? No, not sting and hulk Hogan neckers. That Americans like ourselves love conflict. And we all know there is no better way to get a conflict started than over some ladies. I'm not talking about physically battling them because that would be cb. I'm talking about the weekend to weekend struggle, the hunt. Its obvious if you frequent pubs that there is no shortage of drunk women around. And not even drunk for that matter. So why lately have more and more jealous boyfriends, husbands or ex-husbands been on a whining killing spree? Its happened more and more in the past few months in the heartland. What's the cause of it you may ask. Well, I blame it on the root of all evil...crank first and secondly......FM radio. That's right ho I said it. Ever single song I hear lately is the cry babiest p.o.s ever made. The only way to get your song on the radio is to cry more than the other guy. And go ahead and put make-up on. There's no way these guys should act hard, oh but they do. My daddy never hugged me so get outta my way, I might go ahead and break your face today, or I might go cry in the corner and get rich. That's exactly how it is. You know, Bowie didn't wear make-up because he was depressed, he wore make-up because he nailed dudes man. As far as I go I do own a couple of sad Cd's by the singer Elliot Smith, but to me it is genuine and real. It's not manufactured feeling. And to qualify it even more it never sold good. Not to mention the fact that he allegedly killed himself. Elliot Smith is one of my personal favorite songwriters because even though he sound is down and dreary it still makes me want to fight something when I drink. But, back to the point, I listen to man rock baby. I want to hear about fighting, drinking, sexin', shootin', snortin', because that's life baby. If your girl cheats, nail her best friend, mom, sister anything, don't go cry, get a gun and shoot somebody, at least have the balls to shoot yourself because mofo if she's cheating than your the problem. My credentials? I've made out with 5 different girls in the past couple weeks. Two of them have boyfriends. HaHaha. Thanks for all the lessons Diamond Dave, Gen. George S. Patton, and Terry "Hulk" Hogan. I am a real American.



IWCC quote of the day:

"I drive a station wagon because I have to be on that SR-71 insurance until I'm 21."
-that's probably only funny to me and Mao, or probably just me. I spent a lot of time at airshows growing up.

Congrats Buck Wylde:
---happiness comes in all shapes and sizes.........................................Burn.

Social Fireflies

H2+H1----->He4+n1/0
That's my god.

Social Fireflies:

Alright, Alright. Stoked. Groovy. These and too many more words like them get tossed around in everyday lingo by everyday dickweeds. If I had a penny for every kid that slows his speech down and tries to act like he's high in class I could afford tuition to a real school. The hemp that's on your hat and shoes doesn't get you high, and just because you burn incense doesn't mean that you have a weed smell to cover up. I'd hate to waste my time and energy in typing and just sound like a Tool song, but its too sad that its so true. You want to know something about t-oz? I can hardly buy a shirt at the mall because I'm afraid that someone else would be wearing it. That's right, a dirty little confession. I've also had my eyebrows waxed once. Not that last thing but the one before, these are some of the lengths that I will run myself through not to be in your club. The same club of zit faced green days that still think its cool to smoke pot. I know its just not me getting old, but there has to be something else man. I can't believe that you can go out to a show or a club and see dude's wearing button up smocks and pretty boy pants talking about toking. If you ever need a reminder of what could be, cruise down broadway a few times. Yeah, that's you on your ten speed boy. I honestly do not know one person who smokes that's a go- getter. They have all fell short of a one time goal, or gave it up to take a weed nap. But weeds not a drug! No shit man. Bang an eightball or something. If your going to go in go all in that's what I would do.or did.or do.or. You know a phase should last about a month or something. I have never enjoyed marijuana or anything of its culture. Lets take one last look----dirty, smelly, lazy, at least the tweekers build stuff. But Flipperoo, if its ever cool to not smoke pot you can call me chong. But seriously, quit saying the word stoked. and groovy.

Together in the Darkness

I know freedom of speech is what allows ideals like these blogs to run, but I have to come clean. Who were the dorkiest kids in high school? Which sub-culture were last picked at everything? That's correct, the journalism kids. As I watch Katie, Matt, Al and Ann in the morning and the likes of Carol Klauss and Mike Mcknight in the evening, I remind myself I hate the news. The only good story I have seen recently was a story about a business owner that schooled a local "investigative" reporter. "I just wanna do my job". Yeah right, what you did was do what you originally set out to do before a real story hit you and that was make one up. Hold on thought, call Me floppy. I do like news when its made up. There is a fake news magazine getting sued for supposedly misleading readers? I'm on their side all the way. At least the have the heart to dig the real scoop. How come I've seen the so called controversial Simpsons episode appear but heard no more of Haley's Comet getting probed on the fourth of July? Thanks Fake news magazine for finally putting those two ex child star twins in the spot light for what they are. Drug abusing, sex crazed, half amphibian, test tube babies. Something still doesn't add up. Why does the public not want to read this magazine? This is the same country spends countless hours watching fake reality shows, things blowing up, fake cop chases and cars going around in circles for four hours. And even makes heros out the drivers. Drivers by the way who when interviewed make up more words than I do. At least some of the pro basketball players went to college. But Flip. I do think its crazy that some of these "photo journalists follow some celebrates to the ends of the earth. Man, if those cats followed the likes of us for a month, everybody has a little something to hide. But how cool would it be to change your life because of these poparattzi. I guarantee I would do something jaw dropping. For now we are not famous and we will never be so let me dig some dirt on myself. Here is what's in my fridge at "The Learning Journey":
2 grenades of Mickeys*
5 Sam Adams bottled*
7 corona bottled*
5 bud light bottled*
1 bud light can*
1 fullers london porter bottled*
2 sierra nevada bottled*
1 two liter of coke*
1 package hot dogs
1 half eaten package of bologna
1 half eaten package of cheese slices, the expensive kind
1 week over expiration half gallon milk
1 stick of butter
1 chicken nug lunchable*
the basic condiment trianglular mayo, ketchup and mustard
and the one constant in my life, a twelve pack of RC cola. But you may also refer to it as I do, Freedom. I'm an American.

*all copyrights or trademarks

Arrogant Prose

Thanks for all the feedback on "Win a day with Troy Ounce". Your submissions are being overlooked and will still be taken.

Yeah right, not one person emailed. So you get this. I'd rather ask the stripper anyway.


T.V.

T.V.
my most formidable enemy
all that shimmers is
white teeth
desperate reality

Madeover spouses
trading couches
survivors of greed
mean nothing to me
its not live
unless its c.b.



2.

Bright red corridor
through which I stroll
reminds me of a life
I've stole
and one I've sold

Ash black brain
lets me see
your color, hue, spectrum
so simply

Grape cluster eyes
Pink dandelion smell
you don't see me
at all

Something big brothers don't want you to read

I take my salt by the grain
with a bushel of pain
my mind
is biblical

so I dawn my wax wings
and start to fly
because to me true love is mythical

goin through life
lookin smug
lickin rug
and bugs is all you get

But I can coax a bull dike lessie to ride my tip
cause I'm as sweet as the cocaine drip
sing it

I FEELS BAD

Bitter:
Let me be the first to say Happy Valentines day. To everyone in love go ahead and revel in it. Everybody leaves sometime.


Sweet:
Hello, my name is Troy Oz. And I'm a man. In being a man there's certain guidelines set forth by men of time. One of these is that a man must know his limitations and I hold this to be truth. In knowing my own limits I realize that a person is not always welcome to tread where he wants. Sometimes a man needs a little help. The result is this:

WIN A DAY WITH TROY OZ.

The first annual shameless self promoted win a day with Troy Oz. Why a day instead of a date? Because its open to those married or half-way married persons. Who can Enter? Any lady of Creighton decent wishing to go out for a night. That's right. Any lady from Creighton can email Troy @ pilgrimtroy@yahoo.com and have a chance to be randomly picked for a dinner at Charleston and capped off by a night of drinks at the Blue Jay. All expenses paid. Have emails contain name and proof of "Creighton-ing" and you will be qualified.
* night may be chaperoned

Thanks for loading the pics Mao

Buck Wylde

Troy and Buck and I don't remember who that was

with hair

Troy OZ. (Not my kid!)

MY VAS DEF IS BIGGER THAN YOUR.......

My Angel on the stripper pole (my blood runs cold):

For those of you who are familiar with the Pilgrims, you guys know some stuff. One of the trade marks of them is patronizing local gentleman's establishments and keeping the economy afloat. I've seen other guys fall in love at strip clubs but for me the feeling is always fleeting...until now. Step 1-get real drunk
Step 2-get challenged by your girl who has a boyfriend
Step 3-call Buck Wylde
Step 4-call into work
Step 5-sniff it out
what you end up with is recipe for flat out chaos. Some times you get the urge to lay destruction on some kitties. And that's when I seen her. Some kind of strangely familiar que's. The look of all the kind but a distinct one none the less. Rackin my brain to try to find her place in my mind book. It strikes me. School. Ah yes. Ahead of me two seats over one. I've seen that before.(the tattoo I mean). To cut this story short test day sucked. I couldn't have passed this test unless it was "Brucing 101" and I'm pretty sure it wasn't. Any way I'm in love, but now I can't talk to this kitty because I was just throwing fives and tens at her crotch not 48 hours ago. Blame it on rock n roll. As my man Jerry Lee once said "rock and roll, fuels my soul, makes me psycho, you know!


IWCC quote of the day:

"if social services wants him they can take him, if they can raise that little bastard better than me go ahead.................(later that conversation)........I got sick of whoopin his ass so I took and made a cage over his crib, you should hear him hollarin..............................(later that conversation)...........I never fought my dad and I've been in two bar fights.....-----one shop kid to the others. super dad.



NEWS:
New Pilgrims cd on track and running. Hopefully due out summer '05. Keep checking for updates, lyrics, pics, maybe sound clips if possible.

STILL OF THE NIGHT, STILL OF THE NIGHT, STILL OF THE NIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!