DICKY DO

Its Nine Forty-Four and I'm ravenous. That's right. Every morning no matter how tired or hung over I may be I always get dressed. Never a day has gone by where I have woke up and decided to throw on some flannel pants or sweat pants and rattle down to school. Its no surprise that these outfits are scorched and tattered. Probably have been on for days. I can't fathom why these people cannot take two seconds of the day to look professional. There's enough dirt in this town!


Looking professional:

Ahh yes, this was my whole point this morning. Being of the tree I fell from, I am one of the few males in my family that did not receive the dicky do award(yet). Years and years of time in the gym, on the bike and on the road have kept me still thus far. And that is just for my head. I am in no way, shape or form a professional. I wish I were, but I don't have a fancy piece of paper that tells me I am so I'll just have to keep on truckin. Why if you had to get up in front of people and act like a superior would you have an inferior body. All that knowledge your trying to feed me and you aren't smart enough to quit feeding yourself MackyD's. You would think a chemistry GENIUS could find out that the chemical reaction between fries and mouth equals huge ass. More times than none these people are teachers, and teachers who should know better. Anyone in some kind of biology class should be fit accordingly. But its not only teachers. Preachers, ministers or johns of the cloth, how can you get your point across when its plain to see your temple is not taken care of. So if you disregard that part of scripture than I might disregard that part about you shouldn't kill or something like that. I'm not sure of the verse. People of any stature or rank, or just anybody that thinks they're better than someone else should heed these words. Don't do like the dicky do award winners do. Keep lean, mean and half-way clean and your stomach will never stick out farther than your dicky do.

She's A Slippery Slope

Hello Pilgrims. Let me take this opportunity to thank a couple of people for letting this happen:

1: Mao: pure pibb, piss and petroleum runs through this cat. If I wouldn't still all of his ideas I would have nothing.

2: The gov't i.e. tax payers of America: I'm broke bi-atch. Your hard earned money affords me sitting in a computer lab with nothing to do for at least one hour a day.

3: Sir Mix-Alot: for pointing out that yes, some girls have ridicoloulsy huge glutes'. Which I can witness as I hither and glare from amongst' the perch of technology, high above animosity, in the lab, sitting next to an exchange student with a scab, surrounded by huge butts, butT nothing to grab. Thank you thank you

Now to the point. A question presented, mainly to readers of female descent, but any response will be taken into consideration.
About one year ago I was attending class. I noticed a fare looking lady sitting ahead of me. As time grew and the alright lookers became the status-quo, as does happen while attending a community college, I found myself fancied by this lady. At first, as we do, I acted like and idiot to try to grab some attention. It worked, as it always do, and we began to talk. Eventually steadily and then continued out of class. We went once to the casino, where I threw around money like "the boss" I am, and another time bowling. Sounds good you say, Troy whats the problem? Here's the problem! I like to drink, frequently. Its no secret in the company I keep that what pains me makes me and that is some straight bourbon whiskey my friends. Here comes the flip----she's in alcoholics anonymous. I love to drink at the casino, its the only way to throw the big bet down. How do you make money if you don't play money. And bowling. How do you bowl without your aiming juice. Well being the fan of love that I am I drank nothing on these outings. She insisted that I could, but I'm a man of time, of manners, so I did not induldge. But here's the deal. Everytime she called and I think wanted to do something, Buck Wylde and myself would be discombobulated. Probably chanting the favorite Buck Wylde line: you better hope you miss me if I'm drinking whiskey. That guy is killer. So everytime I talked to her the place was all noisy or I was an a-hole, like i do and the talking stopped. BUT- I just seen her about a week ago. The conversation was quick, but packed with meaning. I did my thing and she did hers. Not exposing anything but leaving the door open for a move. Here's my question-----Its been a week now though. Should I call her and pick up where I left off, should I not call her because that's weird that I still have the number, should I wait to run into her again and then ask her for the number or should i just forget about it and worry about the other five girls in the stable, and their respective boyfriends or what not. Leave a comment, help a friend out.

IWcc Quote of the day: 1-26-05
So there's one pound in a kilogram?

Hippie Smell

This article is a little late in arriving but never the less just as good as a healthy outlet as anytime. I skipped school last week to watch the presidential inauguration. Not that I'm super political, but just the fact that so many dead heads and Frisbee enthusiasts were trying to throw there no sense in the mix, I have never been prouder to be a registered republican and why wouldn't I watch MY crowning achievement. Even in defeat these leftists gathered their bongs and hit the parade route, only to find out that their collective and genius plan had been foiled. Their bright idea to turn their backs as the motorcade drove by(probably for .75 sec) had been squashed at the site of bleachers that welcomed ticketed(paying) customers. And then to see sen. Kerry in the crowd and the look on his face like "I know I'm not president, but I almost got ya" was kind of chuckle worthy. So I went to bed that day happy. The next morning however I awoke to a story that knocked me right back to moderation. It was how Dr. James Dobson was on the record saying that he thought sponge bob square pants was an ally in furthering the gay agenda. This was ridiculous. Just as ridiculous as Jerry Fallwell warning of purple teletubies. Can nothing be childish or a bit wacky anymore. Are these homophobe Christian "leaders" so afraid that anything that resembles horseplay is queer. I know the story of the tolerance video and all the cartoon "stars" that were involved, and how the web site that carries that video are close to the same address, but it cracks me up that Dobson has never apologized or admitted any ignorance over this ordeal. So let it stand on the record. Sponge Bob and Patrick are faggots and may possibly turn your child gay. You know I remember another animated hero, with long hair and crazy ideas. Some people didn't dig where he was coming from and thought he was maybe a little homo erotic. His name was He-man and I watched him everyday. And look me. I turned out swell. And instead of being gay, I've been in and out of more holes than puxatonie Phil. So what is it Dr. James.......That pesky "T".

IwCc quote of the day:

My first venture into the field of blogging is going to be the iwcc quote of the day. These will be actual phrases that I hear while attending Iowa Western Community College. For today, this is the winner, so far(it's early): " I just transferred from community college to community college and my intro to snowboarding class wouldn't transfer".

---I don't even like Sanyo anyway!
Also, not to steal Mao's jive, and try some observational writing, but on the news this morning Wal-mart "fired back" and stated how many jobs they keep and what they sell keeps thousands of people employed. I don't really care, but a company that won't hire skilled union craftsman to build the structure surely won't give the consumer what it wants for what it wants it at. Mao, if your out there please eloquently proceed on the wal-mart talk. All I have to say is "Work Union-Live Better".

---Johnny #5
Also, has anyone ever heard about this pharmaceutical robot that allegiant health uses to fill prescriptions. This robot pulls meds of the shelf, packages them, and barcodes and labels them. I don't rightly recall how long this invention has been in use, but the accuracy rate is stated to be 100%! 100%-somebody's going to work at Arby's when they graduate.

thanks for looking at the first attempted blog. I'm really not sure what direction this will take, but I will assure you the quotes of the day will keep pouring in.